Well... I didn't want to make myself out to be a liar. I said I would blog today. After months, here's the one resounding thought in my mind - dissatisfaction is decent motivation. Knowing that I'm not where I want to be is sometimes heart-breakingly hurtful - that I'm not who I should be as a dad, a friend, a follower of Jesus.... But that deep, deep dissatisfaction with myself can either drag my motivation away or it can be seen as a gift. A gift to get me angry enough - mostly at myself - to change. At this point change is getting harder - I've been doing things for longer. So it makes sense to me that it takes a deeper pain to get my motivation churning. No matter what, it's my choice. There is always choice.
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